Sonntag, 28. September 2008
Freitag, 26. September 2008
+++Angry again
+++Call me a nerd. Call me a geek. Call me lame. Call me whatever you want to. But I got to say this: I am mad.
Let me tell you a little story. Some time ago Ina asked me for good games she could borrow. I gave her the StarCraft basic-game. This made me want to play StarCraft myself again and i started the single-player campaign again (so far I made it to the 4th mission of the 3rd campaign without ANY cheats!). But there was this button, that was grabbing my attention: "multiplayer".
I had not had played a while in battle.net.
I found out why.
I mean I am not a bad player, seriously. But I got owned by so many douches with tower-rushes or some other unfair-unsportly crap like that... that just pisses me off.
If you dont get it, never mind. its just a game. Just a game... just a game...
Let me tell you a little story. Some time ago Ina asked me for good games she could borrow. I gave her the StarCraft basic-game. This made me want to play StarCraft myself again and i started the single-player campaign again (so far I made it to the 4th mission of the 3rd campaign without ANY cheats!). But there was this button, that was grabbing my attention: "multiplayer".
I had not had played a while in battle.net.
I found out why.
I mean I am not a bad player, seriously. But I got owned by so many douches with tower-rushes or some other unfair-unsportly crap like that... that just pisses me off.
If you dont get it, never mind. its just a game. Just a game... just a game...
Donnerstag, 25. September 2008
+++Significance?
+++The media is somewhat amazing. They make money by telling people to buy stuff, they report about senseless crap and everyone is buying it. Literary.
Some time ago the care-taker of Germany's favorite polar-bear died. You would think "who gives a shit?", but apparently enough people do.
The BILD, a boulevard paper that claims to be a newspaper reported on it, front page. Seriously, is that necessary? Arent there any more things to talk about? Are our lives so miserable and insignificant, that we have to think about a polar-bear?
Yeah, he might be cute. But so what? My cat was cute too, when she was still a baby. Every cat is. Lisa's is too, I guess.
Why does anyone care?
Its the same with royals. I really couldnt care less, what the prince of Spain is doing. But I am nuked with informations about hom from every and every side. Just because they can.
I hate it. I freaking do.
Some time ago the care-taker of Germany's favorite polar-bear died. You would think "who gives a shit?", but apparently enough people do.
The BILD, a boulevard paper that claims to be a newspaper reported on it, front page. Seriously, is that necessary? Arent there any more things to talk about? Are our lives so miserable and insignificant, that we have to think about a polar-bear?
Yeah, he might be cute. But so what? My cat was cute too, when she was still a baby. Every cat is. Lisa's is too, I guess.
Why does anyone care?
Its the same with royals. I really couldnt care less, what the prince of Spain is doing. But I am nuked with informations about hom from every and every side. Just because they can.
I hate it. I freaking do.
Montag, 22. September 2008
+++Oooooof course it bursts into flames...!
+++Funny, how a single dream can throw you out of track. Its like a little stone on a rail road.
Im not going to tell you about it. Of course not.
Why would I?
Lately I decided, that life is awesome and fun. Whereas my definition of fun changed. You see, it is a society-thing, that defined pain and sadness as bad things. But I found, that you can actually enjoy them to some extent. And if you do and actually face them instead of putting them away it slowly gets better. You kind of talk yourself into happyness.
Weird.
But it works, at least for me.
Yesterday was great by the way. I sat on stage and read a text of mine and got applauded for it. Amazing. Plus, some of the other writers told me that they liked my performance. Way to go!
Im not going to tell you about it. Of course not.
Why would I?
Lately I decided, that life is awesome and fun. Whereas my definition of fun changed. You see, it is a society-thing, that defined pain and sadness as bad things. But I found, that you can actually enjoy them to some extent. And if you do and actually face them instead of putting them away it slowly gets better. You kind of talk yourself into happyness.
Weird.
But it works, at least for me.
Yesterday was great by the way. I sat on stage and read a text of mine and got applauded for it. Amazing. Plus, some of the other writers told me that they liked my performance. Way to go!
Samstag, 20. September 2008
+++POSER!
+++Buying new things tends to make people happy. What applies to others does just as well to me.
Donnerstag, 18. September 2008
+++
+++I would like to blogg. But all that comes out is the same whiny crap I repeat over and over again, like a broken tape recorder. So I am just not going to do it at all now.
My writing sucks anyway these days.
My writing sucks anyway these days.
Montag, 15. September 2008
+++Withdrawal
+++YFU has the bad habit of making so amazing seminars, that you just get withdrawal from not beeing there. Kinda sucks, doesnt it?
I just enjoyed 4 days of amazingly organized and absolutely awesome work.
I learned a lot. Problem is, I can not really put it into words.
It just happened to quickly, I guess. Well, after all I am really struggeling with putting things down on paper. I didnt write much lately, and all I did was crap. Seriously, I am not even inspired. That is not a good thing, absolutely not.
I just enjoyed 4 days of amazingly organized and absolutely awesome work.
I learned a lot. Problem is, I can not really put it into words.
It just happened to quickly, I guess. Well, after all I am really struggeling with putting things down on paper. I didnt write much lately, and all I did was crap. Seriously, I am not even inspired. That is not a good thing, absolutely not.
Montag, 8. September 2008
+++WICHTIG!
+++Ich kann es nicht oft genug betonen, aber am 21.9.2008 um 20 Uhr ist im Chicago in Hannover die literarische Störung, bei der auch ich sowie weltberühmtheiten wie Silke Liebherr oder Johannes Weigel auf der Bühne stehen und lesen. Kommen lohnt sich also. Der Eintritt ist prinzipiell frei, es sollten jedoch drei Euro Verzehrgeld mitgenommen werden, der netten Gastgeber wegen.
Sorry people, but an English version of this post just wouldn't make any sense, since you wont be able to come to Hanover within the next two weeks, right?
p.s.: Ins Chicago kommt man übrigens nur, wenn man über 18 ist. Warum weiß ich nicht und ob sie das tatsächlich kontrollieren auch nicht. Wollte ich nur gesagt haben, nicht, dass sich sonst wer beschwert.
Sonntag, 7. September 2008
+++Designated to a person I used to know.
+++
The Outsider by A Perfect Circle
Help me if you can
It's just that this is not the way I'm wired
So could you please, help me understand why
You've given in to all these reckless dark desires
You're lying to yourself again
Suicidal imbecile
Think about it, put it on a faultline
What'll it take to get it through to you precious
I'm over this, why do you wanna throw it away like this
Such a mess, why would i wanna watch you
Disconnect and self destruct one bullet at a time
What's your rush now, everyone will have his day to die
Medicated, drama queen, picture perfect, numb belligerance
Narcisistic, drama queen, craving fame and all this decadence
Lying through your teeth again
Suicidal imbecile
Think about it, put it on a fautline
What'll it take to get it through to you precious
I'm over this, why do you wanna throw it away like this
Such a mess, why would i wanna watch you
Disconnect and self destruct one bullet at a time
What's your rush now, everyone will have his day to die
They were right about you
They were right about you
Lying to my face again
Suicidal imbecile
Think about it, put it on a fautline
What'll it take to get it through to you precious
I'm over this, why do you wanna throw it away like this
Such a mess, clueless, clueless
Disconnect and self destruct, one bullet at a time
What's your hurry, everyone will have his day to die
If you choose to pull the trigger, should your drama prove sincere
Do it somewhere far away from here
The Outsider by A Perfect Circle
Help me if you can
It's just that this is not the way I'm wired
So could you please, help me understand why
You've given in to all these reckless dark desires
You're lying to yourself again
Suicidal imbecile
Think about it, put it on a faultline
What'll it take to get it through to you precious
I'm over this, why do you wanna throw it away like this
Such a mess, why would i wanna watch you
Disconnect and self destruct one bullet at a time
What's your rush now, everyone will have his day to die
Medicated, drama queen, picture perfect, numb belligerance
Narcisistic, drama queen, craving fame and all this decadence
Lying through your teeth again
Suicidal imbecile
Think about it, put it on a fautline
What'll it take to get it through to you precious
I'm over this, why do you wanna throw it away like this
Such a mess, why would i wanna watch you
Disconnect and self destruct one bullet at a time
What's your rush now, everyone will have his day to die
They were right about you
They were right about you
Lying to my face again
Suicidal imbecile
Think about it, put it on a fautline
What'll it take to get it through to you precious
I'm over this, why do you wanna throw it away like this
Such a mess, clueless, clueless
Disconnect and self destruct, one bullet at a time
What's your hurry, everyone will have his day to die
If you choose to pull the trigger, should your drama prove sincere
Do it somewhere far away from here
Samstag, 6. September 2008
+++Why the caged bird sings
+++"It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything." - Tyler Durdan.
I have realized something. There are these moments in the life of every man that are simply... well, there is no real adjective for it. But these moments are different from the rest of your life, like a moment of absolut peace and silence in a traffic jam or, in my case, at the trainstation in Lehrte today. Or more, yesterday, since its past midnight by now. I mean Saturday.
I was sitting there, thinking about this quote, of how after you loose everything that is important or seems important to you, you are absolutely free, because you have nothing to loose.
But then on the other hand I wonder, what kind of freedom do you need?
I mean yeah, its kinda gay if all you live for is buying new stuff, yeah. But there are things worth keeping. Friends, for example. Or my bike, since it gives me the pleasure of beeing able to go anywhere i'd like to.
But the main point is, that I don't think humans can handle freedom. We want to be caged, because the limitless possibilities of life can be so disturbing, so confusing. It is good to know, that we don't have that many options, because our poor little minds would be overwhelmed by it.
I have realized something. There are these moments in the life of every man that are simply... well, there is no real adjective for it. But these moments are different from the rest of your life, like a moment of absolut peace and silence in a traffic jam or, in my case, at the trainstation in Lehrte today. Or more, yesterday, since its past midnight by now. I mean Saturday.
I was sitting there, thinking about this quote, of how after you loose everything that is important or seems important to you, you are absolutely free, because you have nothing to loose.
But then on the other hand I wonder, what kind of freedom do you need?
I mean yeah, its kinda gay if all you live for is buying new stuff, yeah. But there are things worth keeping. Friends, for example. Or my bike, since it gives me the pleasure of beeing able to go anywhere i'd like to.
But the main point is, that I don't think humans can handle freedom. We want to be caged, because the limitless possibilities of life can be so disturbing, so confusing. It is good to know, that we don't have that many options, because our poor little minds would be overwhelmed by it.
Donnerstag, 4. September 2008
+++Sick and tired
+++I am sick and tired of beeing single. Yeah, it was fun. Haha. Good joke. Can I have that fluffy-easy life of having a relationship back? Can't everything be easy and fun again?
Seriously, it is pissing me off. All the nice girls are either taken or lesbians. All of them. Yeah, I am not patient. I know. Who cares? I think after all the sacrifices I made for my last relationship I deserve a new one.
Whatever. I am just another emo bitch.
Seriously, it is pissing me off. All the nice girls are either taken or lesbians. All of them. Yeah, I am not patient. I know. Who cares? I think after all the sacrifices I made for my last relationship I deserve a new one.
Whatever. I am just another emo bitch.
Mittwoch, 3. September 2008
+++similarity
+++It is funny how similar our skin is to our soul. If we get hurt, it leaves a scar, that does not heal off anymore completely. And sometimes, during the process of healing the wound itches and we have to scratch it, break the skin open again and feel the pain of the injury once more.
Dienstag, 2. September 2008
+++A study on mankind
+++Since I am not going to school in Burgdorf anymore and have to use the train every morning I am kind of forced to be together with a lot of humans on close space.
Also, this way I get out of the flower-power-world in Burgdorf. I see people eating out of trash cans, sleeping in their own urine... all on my way to school and back.
I see the lemming-like work-zombies standing first line on the train stations. Imagine, a mass-panic breaks loose while the train is approaching. A hundred bloody suits on the railroad. Chaos. Just imagine the mess.
Woah.
But that's not all. By the job I used to have (I quit for self-explanatary reasons) I got the chance to study my fellow homo-sapiens. I used to work as a calling agent, making surveys over the phone, as you can imagine, not the most pleasent job.
Anyhow, I spoke to a lot of people this way. At all I am guessing about 250 or so.
I was amazed and surprised by the collected stupidity I was facing. But I forgot the great examples I wanted to write about. So... uhm... how about some entertainment?
This was it and nothing more.
Also, this way I get out of the flower-power-world in Burgdorf. I see people eating out of trash cans, sleeping in their own urine... all on my way to school and back.
I see the lemming-like work-zombies standing first line on the train stations. Imagine, a mass-panic breaks loose while the train is approaching. A hundred bloody suits on the railroad. Chaos. Just imagine the mess.
Woah.
But that's not all. By the job I used to have (I quit for self-explanatary reasons) I got the chance to study my fellow homo-sapiens. I used to work as a calling agent, making surveys over the phone, as you can imagine, not the most pleasent job.
Anyhow, I spoke to a lot of people this way. At all I am guessing about 250 or so.
I was amazed and surprised by the collected stupidity I was facing. But I forgot the great examples I wanted to write about. So... uhm... how about some entertainment?
This was it and nothing more.
Abonnieren
Posts (Atom)
